PARENTING
Mal.2:15, Gen.18:19, Eph.6:4
Types of parenting
1. Domineering parenting-Eph.6:4
When you dominate your children without love and communication they become afraid of you.
These children have tendency to be violent. They are the type that tend to demand their rights outside. They the ones who grow up to beat rules like traffic rules.
They lock their spirit against your training. At this stage they can only obey in your presence and not in your absence.
They also become afraid of you.
2. Neglectful parenting-Prov.29:15
The children do poorly in school
They have tendency to be rebellious and insecure
3. Permissive parenting:Prov.19:18, 13:24. He doesn’t have rule for the child. The child determines everything. They believe in democracy. No rules and regulation.
The child becomes manipulative. They could develop insecurity and lack of control
4. The loving and firm parent or participating parent:1 Tim.3:4, Eph.6:4
Both parents are responsible for child's up bringing but the father is more responsible for the parenting
When a child is not doing well, God talks to the father e.g. Eli, David. Adam where are thou
Authority and discipline is with you as a man. The onus of discipline is on the man.
This fourth one is the kind of parenting God admonishes us to have in our home.
This parental style give affection to their children. They are involve in their lives. They admire and appreciate their children
1 Cor.11:1.
Fatherhood is about leadership, guardians and support.
Children watch how you react to issues, so they will do what you do not what you say.
What you don't want to see in the life of your children deal with it in your life. John 17:15
Sanctify your self for the sake of your children.
Your children will become reflection of who you are.
If you don't pray at home or study scriptures they will not learn it.
When you don't love people, your children will not learn how to do it.
Let us be good examples to our own children.
THE 4 PHASES OF DEVELOPMENT IN THE LIFE OF A CHILD FROM DAY 0-18 YEARS
Changes brings about growth.
Phase 1: Care giving phase
The child is 100% dependence on you. From age 0-4 years
Phase 2: The authority phase.
The assertion of leadership and authority. Who caught the short.
Age 4-7 years. The child is exercising his will. You must tell the child who is in charge. Is beans everybody is eating today so is beans you will eat. You are wearing t shirt not the native I bought for you. Don't miss this phase. Allow the child to cry. The child's cry is usually manipulative.
Phase 3: Teaching and training phase. Age 6-12 years
What the child needs at this phase is discipline and communication.
Please don't discipline the child when you are angry. They know the punishment require for each offence, don't give more strokes than necessary.
Foolishness in the heart of a child is not removed by communication but by rod.
Also develop communication in addition to discipline
Phase 4: Coaching and cheer leading phase. Age 12-18 years.
You develop strong friendship and relationship with the child. It is very important. At this phase you don't Lord it over them, you guard them through taking decisions.
THINGS TO NOTE WITH RESPECT TO YOUR CHILDREN UP BRINGING
1.Value your children for who they are and not for what they do.
2. Don't favour one child over another
3. Give attention to each of your children
4. Play with your children. Get involved with them. Learn what they are learning and correct every wrong message you notice.
This will help them to develop mentally.
5. Learn to touch your children and tell them you love them. It helps them to develop emotionally. That is why you don't beat them with your hands but you use cane.
Don't also tell the child to knee down, as this may be confused when you tell child to knee down for prayers.
6. Teach your children spiritual things. Study with them , pray with them. Buy books for them. Take them to church. Even while in the car on their way to school, ask them to explain a particular verse of the scripture, and explain appropriately afterward. Confess God's word with them.
7. Be regular and early to meetings; they are watching you.
Compiled by Promise Monday
